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In the interest of full disclosure, this article has absolutely nothing to do with the challenges or opportunities you might face as a promotional products distributor. In fact, it doesn’t really have to do with anything in particular. Except…
Drumroll, please!
Today is Haiku Poetry Day! Woo-hoo! I know, right? Who woulda thunk it? Well, whoever it was should be canonized at once as St. Genius, the Patron Saint of Seventeen Syllables. I mean, if yesterday can be designated Eggs Benedict Day, it only makes sense that Haiku should have its own day.
Check out some other fun and unusual holidays here!
In honor of Haiku Poetry Day, I wanted to share some of the haiku I have written. Writing haiku is pretty easy—rhyming is not necessary, and the only hard and fast rule is that a proper haiku must be three lines composed of syllables numbering 5, 7 and 5 respectively. I frequently deploy it as a late-night sedative that is superior to counting sheep. And it’s a great airplane sport. But be warned, if you opt to compose haiku in public, people will give you odd looks for continually counting on your fingers.
So enjoy some haiku while I book a trip to Nantucket—there’s only 25 days until Limerick Day!
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No rhyme or reason
to National Haiku Day
April 17th
I had my locks changed.
Now the stalker can’t find me
With my new blond hair.
Short front and long back.
It will grow on me with time
To mull it over.
Clever emojis!
They express our feelings and
Don’t count in haiku J
It’s common knowledge
That two wrongs don’t make a right.
Although three lefts do.
Documentaries
About beavers are the best
Dam movies ever.
I tried to hide it
But my last will was clearly
A dead giveaway
I like gummy bears
Because the bears with teeth are
Pretty dangerous.
I had a pencil
That I sharpened constantly
But it was pointless.
The two silkworms raced
But neither won because they
Ended in a tie.
She was engaged to
A man with a wooden leg
But she broke it off.
I am a math nerd
But my parents are to blame:
They gave me square roots.
If you are scared of
Elevators, start taking
Steps to avoid them.
No matter how much
You push the envelope it’s
Still stationary.
You can only ran—
Not run—through campsites
Because it’s past tents.
The clown held the door
As I entered the building.
It’s a nice jester.
When ordered to stop
Imitating flamingoes
I put my foot down
I find—each time I
Google “conjunctivitis”—
A site for sore eyes.
I asked a French man
If he played video games
His response was “Wii.”
An advertisement
For coffins reminds me it’s
The last thing I need.
Bad perforations
Are awful, but good ones are
Really tearable.
From dusk until dawn
The rotation of the Earth
Is what makes my day.
An eskimo home
Is an easy thing to build.
Igloos together.
If a noisy pig
Comes down with laryngitis
Is it disgruntled?
One thing I have learned
Is that double negatives
Are a big no-no.
I went to buy a
Camouflage jacket but I
Just couldn’t find one.
The explosion at
The fromage factory left
Nothing but de Brie.
“Doc! I’m addicted
To Twitter!” To which he said,
“I don’t follow you.”
I admit I’m scared
Of speed bumps, but I’m slowly
Getting over it.
I’m reading a book
About anti-gravity.
I can’t put it down!
A theatrical
Performance focused on puns
Is a play on words.
Rating my haiku,
I know some are for better
And some are for verse.
Dave Miller is VP of Sales & Marketing at Bruce Fox, Inc. and a professional writer by virtue of the fact his company is paying him to write this blog. He plans to celebrate Pythagorean Theorum Day on August 15, 2017, an event that won’t happen again until December 16, 2020. The goal of his blog is to “edu-tain” (educate + entertain) promotional products distributors, with a focus on custom work. Dave also finds it very awkward to write about himself in the third person.
